Whether you are giving or receiving feedback it is useful to bare in mind the following model when it comes to people who receive feedback:
DENIAL: When people first receive feedback, they have a tendency to deny it. Avoid immediate defensiveness – arguing, denying and justifying. This just gets in the way of your appreciation of the information you are being given.
ANGER: After the denial stage comes anger! So you’ve been told that your work is not as good as what it ought to be. You’ve said, “It’s as good as always” so you are denying it then you become angry as it stews in your mind and body. The immediate reaction is to fume!
WITHDRAWAL: After the anger has calmed down, the person has had time to reflect and ponder on the feedback. “Well, I have been making more mistakes then normal”. This is when time is taken out to mull over the feedback and think about what it actually means.
ACCEPTANCE: The final part of this model is finally accepting the feedback, assessing its value and the consequences of ignoring it, or using it. “I HAVE been making mistakes”.
Add these techniques to your tool box of skills and bring them out whenever you need them!